A gentleman asked a waiter to take a bottle of Merlot to an attractive woman he spotted dining alone.
The waiter took the Merlot to the woman and said, "This is from the gentleman seated over there", indicating the sender. She regarded the wine coolly for a second, not looking at the man, and decided to send a reply note to the man. The waiter, who was lingering for a response, took the note from her and conveyed it to the gentleman.
The note read: For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million pounds in the bank, and 7 inches in your pants."
After reading the note, the man decided to compose one of his own returns. He folded the note, handed it to the waiter and instructed him to return this to the woman.
It read: For your information, I have a Ferrari Maranello, a BMW Z4, a Mercedes CL600 and a Porsche Turbo in my garage. There is over twenty million pounds in my bank account. But, not even for a woman as beautiful as you, would I cut off three inches. Just send the bottle back.
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Bassets gone, and so has Wise, the cockney Tosser with the wobbly eyes