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raveydavey
Eddie Gray
Joined: 12 May 2007
Posts: 3952
Location: Leeds Yorkshire England
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 Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2009 7:48 pm Post subject: 20 Reasons *not* to fly Ryanair... |
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http://timesbusiness.typepad.com/...0-reasons-not-to-fly-ryanair.html
You have to admire the audacity of everyone’s favourite love-to-hate chief executive Michael O’Leary.
His latest stunt, to cause outrage by suggesting that Ryanair might start charging holidaymakers “a pound to spend a penny” onboard, made it on to the cover of The Daily Express. In the process, one imagines, reminding several hundred thousand hard up Britons to take advantage of the airline’s spring seat sale.
This week The Sun reports: “A saucy stewardess is putting the thrills in no-frills airline Ryanair.”
The “34B Czech stunner” , it alleges, has been given her bosses’ blessing to moonlight as a porn star.
Depressingly, all publicity is good publicity when you are the world’s leading budget airline and Ryanair doesn’t give a damn whether you like it or not. O’Leary knows that when it comes to the crunch, especially this credit one, you will still turn to him for a cheap weekend jolly.
But while the airline can be cheap, the customer service truly sucks. So, here are 20 things to remember next time you are led into temptation by those 1p flights.
1. 1p flights are never 1p
Even if you strike it lucky and find a 1p flight you actually want to take, Ryanair charge you for the pleasure of paying for it. To the tune of £4.75. For each passenger. Each way.
And that doesn’t even include…
2. The check-in charge
If you want to book a bag into the aircraft hold you must check in at the airport, which will cost you £4.75 per passenger, per way, if you book online and a whopping £10 per passenger, per way if you pay at the airport or over the phone. And it doesn’t matter if only one person in your party takes a bag, everyone else still has to pay to check in at the airport too.
This week Ryanair announced that it’s all change from May when airport check in will rocket to £20 per person, per way. That is a grand total of £160 for a return flight as a family of four.
All without factoring in…
3. The baggage charge
Which is an extortionate £9.50 per bag, per flight. Or £19 if you book at the airport or over the phone.
4. The sneaky weight limit
Ryanair set its weight limit for hold luggage at 15kg catching the majority of passengers off guard.
You’re not allowed to pool bags either so, even if you have a party of four sharing luggage, if the bag weighs 16kg you will be charged £14 per additional kilo. Nevermind that it makes not a jot of difference to the weight of the aeroplane.
5. Queues glorious queues
If you’re still talking to your partner following the inevitable blazing row about why you shouldn’t just pay the bloody charges listed above, you won’t be after being told to join the back of the enormous queue at the ‘payments’ desk.
6. The additional baggage charge
Probably best to wear all of your clothes at once on the flight if you are travelling somewhere for more than a couple of days (until Ryanair start charging passengers for excess body weight that is). Check more than one bag in and it will cost you another £19 per extra piece of luggage, per way.
7. The website is rubbish. On purpose.
You have no choice but to book a Ryanair flight through its website so the airline may as well make it as stressful an experience as possible. The website is ugly for starters, and it crashes. All the time.
Because you can’t easily browse for dates when cheap flights are available you have to dedicate at least five precious hours of your life to sitting in front of the screen and laboriously trying different combinations to find a good deal.
And if you don’t understand what the hell you’ve just pressed there is no one to e-mail. Because Ryanair want you to spend more money and phone its…
8. Premium rate internet helpline
Calls cost £1 a minute to speak to someone in a call centre. Be amazed if you can explain what your problem is for under a fiver.
9. You can only fly cheap mid week
To get the bargains that make the pain of Ryanair worth the gain you have to be prepared to fly on a Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday, which can rule out the bargain European weekend break. Kind of why you wanted to book with Ryanair in the first place.
10. You have to travel at obscene hours.
Not only are you travelling on a Tuesday you also have to be prepared to wake up at 2am to get to the airport two hours ahead of your 6.55am flight. Or, if you choose a more civilised evening departure time, arrive in your destination at midnight with no where to stay because…
11. The destination airports are in the middle of nowhere.
Don’t expect to fly to Frankfurt if you book a flight to Frankfurt, to name one of many examples. Frankfurt Hahn airport where Ryanair land is 120 km from the city centre.
12. A bottle of water on board costs £3
I know the moral of this story is to buy a drink from WH Smith before you board, but it’s still annoying.
13. Sweaty, plasticky seats
Whatever you do, don’t wear shorts or you might be stuck to your seat forever and forced to listen to…
14. The in-flight musak
Pray that your flight is not delayed before it takes off or you’ll have to put up with the bleepy, computer-game inspired musak that is played on loop as your board, over, and over.
15. The fanfare
Do we really need the shrill fanfare that sounds when/if the flight lands on time? Or does it just ruin the first three minutes of each passenger's holiday?
16. You can’t book a seat
As if the British holiday ritual of crowding round the baggage carousel isn’t enough to warrant the use of blood-thinning medication, Ryanair invite you to partake in the extreme sport that is racing across the tarmac to get a seat next to your companion. Flip flops are a distinct disadvantage.
17. No refunds, ever
Unless you have a spare few days to waste do not even bother trying.
18. Poor compensation
A report by the UK’s Air Transport Users Council has found that the world’s airlines lost more than one million bags in 2007 and more than 42 million pieces of luggage were mishandled worldwide.
Guess who it named as the worst airline for compensation if your bag goes missing or is damaged?
19. You are always being flogged stuff
No we don't want your ridiculously overpriced travel insurance, car hire or Ryanair tea-towels. Go away.
20. Michael O’Leary himself
Don't tell me you can bear to make him any more smug?
By Laura Whateley
_________________ The advert above is nowt to do with me!
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NE1
Neither Shallow Nor Sexist
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raveydavey
Eddie Gray
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NE1
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Garp
Allan Clarke
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| Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 6:01 pm Post subject: |
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Just flew using them......Always feel ripped off, but they go to destinations other airlines do not. The thing that got me most was Euro 4.50 for a small can of beer.
I think the checked in luggage allowance now is 15Kg. The add ons to the initial cost are beyond belief, but once you know what an underhand organisation they are, you take your choice and do it or vote with your feet.
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NE1
Neither Shallow Nor Sexist
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| Posted: Fri Mar 27, 2009 8:27 am Post subject: |
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| ...and we have so little choice of destinations from Newcastle that we have to use ryanair/jet2/easyjet. Saying that they are cutting back too and its getting to the point whereby if you like Spain you are in luck, but only to the costas, nowhere interesting like Madrid, Seville, Grenada(sp?)
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raveydavey
Eddie Gray
Joined: 12 May 2007
Posts: 3952
Location: Leeds Yorkshire England
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| Posted: Fri Mar 27, 2009 6:46 pm Post subject: |
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| NE1 wrote: | | ...and we have so little choice of destinations from Newcastle that we have to use ryanair/jet2/easyjet. Saying that they are cutting back too and its getting to the point whereby if you like Spain you are in luck, but only to the costas, nowhere interesting like Madrid, Seville, Grenada(sp?) |
The in-laws have a place in near Limoges in France and Ryanair currently fly there from East Midlands and Liverpool, which aren't too bad to get to. When they bought the house though the only place you could fly from was Stanstead, which added a 4 hour drive onto each end of the flight home...they'll be buggered if they cut back those flights.
Flybe also fly there from Southampton, but that is even worse.
Air France fly there from Scumchester but you have to go via Paris and it costs about £300.....like Garp says, you pays your money and takes no check in luggage and sprint across the tarmac!_________________ The advert above is nowt to do with me!
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NE1
Neither Shallow Nor Sexist
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| Posted: Sat Mar 28, 2009 8:51 am Post subject: |
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| raveydavey wrote: | | like Garp says, you pays your money and takes no check in luggage and sprint across the tarmac! |
its all part of the fun.
When we went to Krackow, there were some little old ladies and a gay son who had paid for speedy boarding. They started queuing at the gate an hour before the flight was called. When called off they went, the speediest ones first to get their seats together by the door, about 9 needed in all ( we knew this cos they done the same on our outward flight!). We had checked in online so were 'A' for boarding. Off we went .......to the bus. Yes the dear old ladies had got priority boarding for the bus as the plane was across the tarmac! They were not happy  . Their solution, push the two speediest one to the doors at either side of the bus so they could be first off! the people on the bus were watching this shenanigans with total amusement . Mr NE1 was standing by the door, he is 6ft 3ins tall with very long legs. The old lady jostling for position near him was about 5ft tall, I could see the thought float across his mind. "All I need to need is walk quickly and I could scupper their plans" (evil man he is). Off the bus he walked very quickly and then at the last minute slowed to let the old lady win ( we didn't want the seats by the door really ). She punched the air cos she had won and we still laugh about it to this day.
fun, fun, fun
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raveydavey
Eddie Gray
Joined: 12 May 2007
Posts: 3952
Location: Leeds Yorkshire England
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| Posted: Sat Mar 28, 2009 2:57 pm Post subject: |
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| NE1 wrote: | | raveydavey wrote: | | like Garp says, you pays your money and takes no check in luggage and sprint across the tarmac! |
its all part of the fun.
When we went to Krackow, there were some little old ladies and a gay son who had paid for speedy boarding. They started queuing at the gate an hour before the flight was called. When called off they went, the speediest ones first to get their seats together by the door, about 9 needed in all ( we knew this cos they done the same on our outward flight!). We had checked in online so were 'A' for boarding. Off we went .......to the bus. Yes the dear old ladies had got priority boarding for the bus as the plane was across the tarmac! They were not happy . Their solution, push the two speediest one to the doors at either side of the bus so they could be first off! the people on the bus were watching this shenanigans with total amusement . Mr NE1 was standing by the door, he is 6ft 3ins tall with very long legs. The old lady jostling for position near him was about 5ft tall, I could see the thought float across his mind. "All I need to need is walk quickly and I could scupper their plans" (evil man he is). Off the bus he walked very quickly and then at the last minute slowed to let the old lady win ( we didn't want the seats by the door really ). She punched the air cos she had won and we still laugh about it to this day.
fun, fun, fun |
Older readers may remember when me and mrs ravey were stranded in Mexico after Hurricane Wilma. During our stay there were an older couple from Chehsire - she was a retired nurse (sorry Bron and Pat!) and was never short of an opinion although the hubby seemed a decent enough chap if a little set in his ways. Anyways on the day we were being flown out, we'd been warned that as it was an 'evacuation flight' no seat bookings were being honoured, it was simply a case of get on and grab a seat - if you weren't together, tough. He turned up in reception on crutches and she immediately started banging on about how they needed priority treatment as he couldn't stand and needed extra legroom on the flight. Funnily enough he'd managed for the fortnight up to this point without the crutches making an appearance once...
Anyway the resort manager put them on the first coach for the airport and they sat there at the front laughing to each other as it set off. How we laughed when we got on a later coach which the resort manager then boarded and set off, passing all the other coaches that had already left and were waiting a couple of hundred yards up the road! Oddly the old lass didn't look happy when we passed her though.
And then when we got to the airport she was at it again and as luck would have it when the airport bus got to the plane, the door I was stood at was literally right at the bottom of the steps up onto the plane.  First on and choice of whatever seats we wanted.
If looks could kill when they eventually got on....  _________________ The advert above is nowt to do with me!
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raveydavey
Eddie Gray
Joined: 12 May 2007
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Location: Leeds Yorkshire England
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Gopher
Boobmeister
Joined: 07 May 2007
Posts: 3364
Location: Riding on the window lickers bus, first class.
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| Posted: Sat Apr 25, 2009 8:22 am Post subject: |
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I would rather take holidays in Skegness than fly with that shower of shit._________________ 
It was like that when I got here. |
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raveydavey
Eddie Gray
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Location: Leeds Yorkshire England
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Gopher
Boobmeister
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Location: Riding on the window lickers bus, first class.
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wewantourdarbyback
Eddie Gray
Joined: 11 May 2007
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Location: Leeds University
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. I didn't actually realise it was cos we got there on time.
